TOP FIVE tips for your engagement session!!

One of my favorite things to photograph is engagement sessions. I love them not only because I think it is an amazing way to connect with you before your actual day but also because they are typically less formal, there is typically not as many time constraints (unless, of course, you are trying to get as many photos in before the sun completely goes down), and usually-at least from what I have heard- they are far less intimidating/boring/MEH as most thought going into the shoot. And by most I really mean a majority of my grooms. :) I believe in engagement sessions SO much that I include them AS A GIFT for everyone the books their wedding with me.

Inevitably I get asked what my perspective is on different factors that can affect your engagement session. (Which I LOVE when people ask because I want you to love these photos AND have fun-because, remember, this is suppose to be FUN.) Clearly, there are exceptions to every rule and EVERY photographer will probably have a somewhat different viewpoint on what their TOP FIVE tips would be. These are just mine but have found that these are typically a pretty good rule of thumb to follow. Are you ready? LET’S GOOOOOOO.

1.) It is hard for me to pick the number one thing I suggest because basically all of these are things I will recommend when chatting with my couples. But number one. Pick your ideal weather. Again, there exceptions to this rule. Mainly, if you get engaged January 1st and plan on getting married October 1st you don’t necessarily have ALL the seasons to pick from. I have had people pick the exact OPPOSITE of what they are getting married-for instance you are getting married in the summer so you want options and choose to do your engagement session in the snow.

IMPORTANT to note. There is no “bad” season to take your engagement photos. There is definitely some ideal weather and NOT ideal weather but even that is based on your perspective-and truthfully how much you sweat. There are a few months-at least in Minnesota-that are generally not as much fun to take photos in. January is usually one of them. When the temps fall into the “feels like” -40 not many would say, let’s go outside for 45 minutes and play in the snow. And truthfully when it is that cold I recommend rescheduling because it really isn’t safe. On the flip side July-although gorgeous sunsets and NOT cold-you can sometimes deal with heat and humidity so intense that within five minutes you have sweat off all your make up, your mascara is traveling down your face, pit stains, and do you really want to get all lovey and cuddly with your person when they are sweaty, clammy, and smell?

Truthfully, the weather doesn’t hinder me much. I am not IN the photos so I can bundle up OR sweat and it not matter. But there have been an occasion or two where my couples were so hot, or cold, that we may have had to work a bit harder to look carefree and fun.

2.) Decide on the time of DAY that is important to you to shoot in. There are only so many sunsets per year, photographers books often don’t have a ton of wiggle room so if you want a sunset then you may have to wait to get one. I am partial to sunsets because there is something insanely magical, warm, and Nicholas Spark(esk) to them. I will often recommend rescheduling if there isn’t one and we know that is important to you. I have done this for a long time and I will tell you BOTH cloudy and sunsets are beautiful but if you are wanting that warm/glowy look-you NEED to have a sunset. Unless, of course, your photographer can create that for you while they are editing. I personally prefer to have the sunset to begin with but again, it really is a personal preference.

I also love sunrise sessions. These are typically more my jam in the winter as the sunrise is at 8 AM vs 4 AM-at least in Minnesota. But that is neither here nor there. However, there is something very soft and beautiful as the sun is waking up.

Let’s talk about rain. Can it be gorgeous? YES. One of my favorite shoots happened when a surprise thunderstorm rolled through. The images are stunning because my couple went with it. They didn’t care about their hair/make up or even looking soggy. They embraced the rain and in five minutes we got some of my favorite images I have ever taken. We also got drenched but a little rain never hurt anyone…

3.) CLOTHES. I have found that what you choose to wear to your session can make or break your ability to relax and have fun. For instance-you know that cute dress you found online? The one on a 5’10 model? That hits her “just right”? For those of us that are not close to 5’10 that same dress is going to hit us different. Make sure when you purchase it you sit in it, twirl in it, and maybe even joggle in it to see if we are going to have to work a bit harder to hide things that you would rather not be seen by your grandparents or Aunt Linda.

I am going to use myself as an example here-although I haven’t not had to plan one of these shoots for myself yet. Here we go. I can’t walk in heels. Never have been able to and it has honestly only gotten harder as I have gotten older. My main shoe that I wear 99% of the time is a flat bottom shoe of some sort. In saying that-wearing any kind of heel for my engagement session would be hazardous at best and severely uncomfortable FOR ME. And you know what shows on your face-uncomfortable. Your Spanx too tight-you can see that in your face. Your socks are wet-you can see that on your face (MOST of the time).

Same with dresses. What looks good on pinterest or online may not look great on you. OR it doesn’t fit the atmosphere you are shooting in. I personally LOVE, LOVE, LOVE oxymorons. In certain situations. So, a field at sunset with a couple wearing formal wear. It’s different and I LOVe different. But let’s just say you are north shore kind of people. You like to hike and camp and make your food on a fire. Those same clothes may not jive as well in downtown Minneapolis. Not that they can’t-they just may be more fitting on a rock somewhere.

Personally, I LOVE movement of any kind. I love running/walking/playing in fields. I love twirling and dancing and games. That being said sometimes we choose clothes that do not allow us to do that. Some skirts/dresses create beautiful movement and when you are running/playing in them you don’t have to worry about anything flying up and creating a scene. OR jeans!! I also love to have my couples sit and talk with each other (and with me). Sometimes, well, most of the time, wearing pants/jeans (at least for girls) works best for these scenarios. Unless, you don’t mind sitting on grass or in a field wondering what may or may not be crawling around you-then by all means wear that skirt that you love.

AND TRUELY. When asked about clothes the FIRST thing I will tell you is where what YOU feel confident in. Not what your friends think looks best, or even what you have seen or read online. When YOU feel confident the outcome is REALLY amazing photos that YOU will love and since it really only matters if YOU love them…

Last thing about clothes. I could go on and on but I am trying to keep this short. (I also send all of this information to my couples when they hire me so they can be prepared.) SOCKS. So MANY PEOPLE FORGET ABOUT WHAT SOCKS THEY ARE WEARING. This is predominantly a male thing-but it can be both-think about what kind of socks do you have on. Because I guarantee you that you will see them. So, if you like your all white athletic socks mixed with your suit-by all means-you do you boo boo. But if it is going to bug you every time you look at the photos and all you are going to see is the white socks. Get different ones. OR go without. You can thank me for this tip later.

4.) RELAX. TRUST US. This is not our first rodeo, well, at least, for most of us. And we want this to be fun for you because just like uncomfortable shows on your face-so does fun. I will be the first to tell you that some of my cues are kind of out there. (Not in a weird way) More so in a “you want me to run back and forth IN PLACE while holding hands and laughing at each other?” Won’t we look dumb? In that moment you may feel a bit dumb but the photo you get from it will be well worth it. So, go with it. Unless you feel absolutely, completely uncomfortable doing something just try to go with it. For instance, I have had people tell me they HATE running. And although my “running” is more like-pretend you are on Baywatch and woggle towards me-if you don’t feel comfortable doing so then we don’t have to. I have far more cues where that came from.

But if I ask you what your favorite thing about your person is-it can be helpful to actually list something off. Now, I get it, not everyone is a words of affirmation kind of person. And not everyone thinks on their feet. But at least TRY to participate. I promise it will make a world of difference if you engage with what we are asking you to do and go along with our prompts. Utilize this time with your person to reminisce, dream, laugh, and hear a bit of what is poking around in their brain.

5.) Do YOU. You guys like to ride bike? Bring the bike. You have ten dogs that you love. Bring ‘em. Every Friday you go and get ice cream? Then let’s head to Nelsons. But make this engagement session about YOU. Don’t overthink it. Get glammed up if you want. Wear the weave, the eyelashes, or your favorite football team’s jersey. Find inspiration images but REMEMBER that those inspiration images are just that-inspiration. Example-if you show me a photo of a couple frolicking in the ocean and we are doing your session in Minnesota? We can get it close-but there is no such thing as an actual ocean here. Or mountains. We have some areas that are similar and I LOVE the north shore or the bluffs along the river. But Colorado mountains are different.

Ultimately, the goal of all wedding vendors, but for this particular topic your photographer, is to create a lifelong, fun memory for you to take with you. To not only create stunning images of the two of you but also give you a glimpse of what your wedding day photos may look like. (Caveat to this. There are certain questions I have been known to ask to my couples when they are alone vs questions I may ask if their parents are nearby…)

But truthfully we can only do so much. YOU have to decide to come and have fun. If you get into a fight on the way to the session-which happens way more than you think-kiss and make up. Shelf that fight for two hours. If you know you are a little dry or really nervous and a shot of fireball (or tequila) will help you let your guard down-tell me and I will bring three-two for you guys and one for the dog. (JOKING) But most importantly know we want to serve you the best we know how. This isn’t just a job for most of us. It is something we are passionate and love very much.

I hope these five tips help. They are not an exclusive list and truthfully I could probably come up with 15000000 more. However, ADHD brain doesn’t really allow more than 90 seconds reading/looking at an article sooooooooo… Let me know in the comments if this is helpful, if you have anything else YOU would add, or save it for when the time comes that YOU are getting YOUR engagement photos done.

Oh, and for the LOVE of all things. DO NOT WEAR STRIPES. Plaid is one thing. Stripes is a whole other ball of wax that you just do not want to mess with. Promise. You just don’t.